Pushing through

As you all know, I have taken up running.  Although I still enjoy it, it is getting harder to get out there and do it for a couple of reasons.  It's getting colder.  I love and dislike running in the cold.  I like it, as I don't overheat and can go much longer distances in the cold.  I like that my legs get a little numb and the burn of the hills doesn't hit me as hard.  I don't like it because my body temp is ALWAYS changing. I start out cold, then have to delayer as the run continues.  Eventually I get to this place where my core is hot and my extremities are cold.  If I put on another layer to warm my extremities, I'm too hot so I always opt to run with cold extremities.  I could really use some better running clothes, but the budget won't allow. I have bought enough to get me by.  I would also like to see if I stick with this before I make that kind of investment.

I've been having trouble with my left knee.  It feels pretty good at the beginning of the runs, but by the last mile, it starts aching a little. The pain is not severe, it's just annoying.  When I finish it just aches a little off and on.  It doesn't hurt when I walk or anything, but it does hurt when I go down stairs.  I know there has got to be something going on in that kneecap.  I tried to take off 3 days (more than normal) to see if I could heal it, but I could tell no difference.  It is not swollen or anything.  I also tried to wrap it for a day and run with the wrap on.  Still, I could tell no difference. 

I figured it was time for new shoes.  My shoes were pretty worn and the soles were breaking down.  We shopped all day for shoes.   I made a short grocery list so I could use the rest of our grocery money to afford the shoes.   Although I love, love, loved a pair of New Balance shoes I tried on, but the price didn't fit in our budget.  So I narrowed it down to a pair of Asics and a pair of Reebok Zigs.  The Reebok people were able to make the best case for their shoes and my knee problem, so I decided to take the plunge.  They are comfy, not as comfy as my Saucony shoes I just retired, but close.  However, my main concern is taking the shock out of my knees so I can heal them and these shoes showed promise of possibly doing that.

I read a lot of reviews on these shoes, and most people have great things to say about them.  One woman said her knee pain went away after two weeks of running in them.  I ran on them one time.  I am up to 5 mile runs now. I can't say they make me feel like I am propelling forward with every step as the ads claim they will do.  A hill still feels like a hill people.  I can, however, say I feel more stable on my feet.  My knee pain is still there at the end of my run, but I suspect that the pain will take awhile to subside as I'm pretty sure there is some healing that needs to take place and it will just take more time.  The shoes won't magically heal my knees overnight.  The only thing that concerns me a bit about my new shoes is that my calves started cramping up a bit during the run.  The only other time that happened to me was during the first week I started running.  I'm not sure if that was a fluke or the new shoes.  We shall see. One thing is for sure, they look hideous. Certainly not my first choice in style, but I didn't get them for the look but the promise of being more gentle on my joints.  We shall see. 

My 5K is in two weeks. I am going to do my best to push through.  After the race, I may take a week off to see if I can't get my knees to heal up completely.  Hopefully, I don't lame myself before then. I figure as long as there is no swelling, I'm safe to still run on them.  We shall see.  One thing is for sure, makes it hard to get motivated to get out there with these problems.  I want to make this a lifestyle change for the good.  I know that the honeymoon phase of this new adventure is over and the real work has begun.  Not making any promises, but I certainly am proud of sticking with it for two months now.  NEVER in my wildest dreams did I think I could run 5 miles.  I guess I am stronger than I give myself credit for.  If it all stops after my race, at least I can say I did it and I know I'll know what I am capable of. Time will tell how long this lasts.

Biter

I have a biter at daycare.  Have I mentioned this before?  Before it was kind of random, but now it's an everyday occurrence.  Last week she bit my other daycare child and caused a blood blister and bruise on his shoulder.  Thankfully the other bites haven't been as bad until this morning.  Brennan got her hand chomped on pretty badly.  I've told Mom about it and she is struggling with it at home too.  Neither of us have ever dealt with a biter.  The advice I have gotten from others have been anything from popping a teether in her mouth when she goes to bite (not very logical as I'd have to be following her around everywhere to catch her in the act) to leaving her in the play pen.

I have coached the other kids to push her head back gently when she goes in for the kill and that has worked to some degree.  I have also coached the kids to distract her when she comes over and wants to barge in on what they are doing which is always what starts these epidsodes.  She gets angry because they don't want her in the middle of what they are doing and rightly so as she will ruin all of it or take off with some of it.  Yes, she's teething, but most episodes are brought on by anger.  She's also hitting, pushing, and pulling hair.  At one point she was pulling Kadyn's hair and trying to sit on her head; she was taking down my 4 year old!  Kadyn had a hard time getting over that one.  Little biter is only 15 months old for crying outloud!  It doesn't seem a 15 month old should be able to do this.

I understand her language skills are still developing and this is her way of communicating her frustration.  It really puts me in quite a pickle as I want her to understand that biting hurts and isn't allowed.  I feel that simply redirecting her all the time may not help her understand this.  For now, I have resulted to baby gating her in the toy room by herself.  I have scheduled "toddler time" where both her and Brennan get my undivided attention, but I can't keep my eye on her 24/7 when I'm cooking or cleaning or such.  I have to be able to trust her and frankly right now I can't.  It's been very very frustrating.

In about a month Mom will be pulling her out of daycare for 3 months because her show will be in off season and she will be out of work for 3 months.  I am sad to say I am looking forward to this break.  If we don't find a replacement it could get stressful at my house financially, but at this moment in time I think the safety of the other children (and my sanity) are at stake.  I adore her mother.  A sweet woman. I feel very sorry for the burden she is carrying being a single mother of three, one of which has special needs.  I hope her 3 months off brings her and her children rest and perhaps helps this little gal get over whatever it is that is causing these issues.  3 months can bring a lot of change in a child of this age.  Here's hoping it brings a big one.

Halloween 2010

Halloween for our family started Saturday afternoon.  Kadyn and I carved a pumpkin. She practiced drawing faces on paper and then she drew one on the pumpkin (with a little assistance).  She actually carved out the nose and eyes, and I carved the mouth out.  This year she LOVED it!  Last year she thought it was too gross, so it was a big improvement.  Bren wasn't too interested.

Then Sunday, around noon, Jeff's side of the family showed up to join in on the fun.  First we went to a fundraiser complete with BBQ food and mini golf.  P.S.  Don't worry, uncle J wasn't really in jail.  He was just being funny with a prop at the mini golf course.

Later that night the entire family dressed up and went trick or treating.  Our neighborhood was HOPPING just like everyone told us it would be.  It was really fun.  Brennan and Kadyn did such a good job.  We walked an entire mile and didn't even walk the entire neighborhood.  Their buckets were full and heavy.  Some of the houses really decorated and went all out with fog, scary sounds, spider webs, and other neat decorations. A few neighbors even had stations set up in their driveway to hand out candy.  By far, this is the best neighborhood we have ever lived in for halloween.  Good times.  Good memories.

Luckily Grandma escaped the law!

Kadyn lucked out that she got to do most of trick or treating with her buddy.

We thought this costume was AWESOME!  Can you guess what it is from?

Good times, can't wait to do it again!

Garden reflection

I cut all my pepper plants, herbs, and tomato plants to stubs today.  Last night was our first hard freeze.  I picked all fruit whether it was done or not and snipped all the herbs I could get my hands on.  This is my second gardening attempt since I've been married.  My first was at our first home in Lee's Summit, MO.  I have no idea how well that one turned out because it was severely neglected do to morning sickness.  I couldn't even bring myself to look at it for the entire summer and leading into the fall. This is the first time I have ever did container gardening and I am reflecting now on what I learned.  Here's what I came up with.


1.  Miracle grow is a miracle and container vegetables will die without it..
2.  If your container drains well, always use more fertilizer than what it says to use on the box.
3.  Even if your pepper's leaves are curly, don't fret.  It will still yield an impressive crop. 
4.  Spiders like to build thier webs in pepper plants.  Don't fret, it will still produce fruit. 
5.  Plant different types of herbs in different containers, not in the same container.
6.  You must water EVERYDAY if your container has good drainage.
7.  You are not ready for a big garden on land until you have children who are old enough to help and take care of themselves (or at least until the water spout on your house is actually accessible from ground level).
8.  You can have the biggest, most beautiful  tomatoe plant, but if it is not pollinated it will not yield any fruit.
9.  Shake your tomato plant to pollinate it so it will actually produce fruit
10.  Make sure you have plenty of people to share your herbs with.  It'll produce more than you could ever use in a year.
11.  Having a garden isn't the most vacation friendly thing to do.
12.  Having fresh produce on hand at any given time is pure joy.
13.  You really will save money on produce with a little time and dedication.
14.  Watching things grow is just fun.

It was a fun year to learn how to container garden.  Next year I plan on adding a few other vegetable containers.  I dream about being able to can tomatoes someday. Now that I know about the whole pollination thing (which I didn't find out about until late August), I might actually get a good harvest of tomatoes next year.  I'd love to make a bunch of salsa and can it.  As i speak I have gobs of green tomatoes I picked yesterday; they didn't have enough time to ripen before the freeze.  Probably wishful thinking, but I hope they ripen so I can actually feel like all that work watering them was worth it.  If only I could grow an orchard in containers too.  Then I'd have it made.

They change

I realized it's been quite some time since I've discussed the girls and how they are doing.  I know I tell a few stories here and there, but for my own memory it's nice to write these things down so I never loose them.  After all, they change.  What once seems like it would be part of their personality forever sometimes changes overtime and in the blink of an eye, at times it seems as if I have an entirely different child than I did 3-6 months ago.  This is long, sorry.

Brennan

Brennan has hit her language explosion.  She is trying to say new words everyday.  There was a time when I was quite concerned that she was behind.  We fought so many ear infections last winter that she wasn't even saying Mama when she turned one.  I no longer worry.  In fact, she has even started to put two words together here and there.  I LOVE LOVE LOVE this stage.  It is so endearing, cute, and funny to hear how she say's things and to watch her try to communicate things with such enthusiasm. 

Last winter she was very challenging.  Perhaps it was the teething.  Perhaps it was the language barrier. Perhaps it was adjusting to me babysitting,  Perhaps it was that we were ALWAYS sick.   I don't know, but it made me wonder what kind of person she was going to be as she grew up.  Now I have a much different child on my hands.  If I could describe Bren in three words it would be happy, goofy, and soft-natured.  She squeals with excitement the moment I walk into her room to pick her up in the mornings.  She LOVES to be loved on and loves to give lovings back.  When she gets her feelings hurt, it is written all over her face; the girl loves hard.

She wants nothing more than to be "one of the big guys" and actually fits in better with the older kids than with the other little gal who has less of an age gap. I love watching her tag along trying to mimic everything the "big guys" do.  I get a little sentimental and think of my own mother and how that must have also warmed her heart to see me do the same thing. 

Brennan still has a healthy fear of falling. She's slowly getting better, but even Daddy swinging her around freaks her out a little.  I haven't had the heart to give the swing at the playground another try.  Last time she shook and had a look of sheer terror in her eyes.  It was one of the saddest things I've ever seen.

We have been working very hard on identifying animals and the sounds they make.  The dog is her favorite.  Now whenever she scribbles with crayons on paper she declares it, "dog, wf wf wf." The church nursery always sings her praises and often comments on how they wish other children were more like her.  I think that must mean they have some real stinkers in there.  She LOVES to be read too and will sit on your lap FOREVER to hear stories.  She even sits through the big kid books.  She has a rather large attention span for a child her age, much like her sister.

We have also been working on colors.  She grasps that things are different colors but when asked the color of a certain object she always declares it "wewoh" (yellow).  I guess we still need to work on that.  She has almost mastered her shape sorters, loves stacking blocks, and can make a line of blocks if I tell her too. She loves to play pretend.   Just yesterday she was running through the house making flying sounds in her superhero cape I made her.  And of course, she loves to feed me food from her kitchen.
 
Brennan is almost ready to potty train.  She's got the terms down and she seems to understand the concept.  I think we may give it a go in another month after she turns two. I hope she gets it as quickly as her big sissy did.  Having carpet this time around is making me dread this process.  I'm not really into the whole pullups thing, so this could get messy.  It worked the first time.  Here's hoping my luck holds out the second time around.  Good thing she likes chocolate as much as her sissy.  That was a BIG motivator.

I've been very lucky that Brennan has been very responsive to time outs.  She doesn't throw fits or have crying spells.  She goes in to her time out a little miffed and comes out smiles and happy to oblige.  Lord I hope that stays that way, but the experience in me remember what age 3 is like.  We shall see. She is such a gentle natured child.  She is NOT a fighter.  Unfortunately that makes her an easy victim when daycare is in session.  I've had to coach her in how to stick up for herself without being physical. 

Brennan is really such a joy and light in my life.  I can't wait to see her personality blossom as life goes on.  Her vigor for life is contagious and she is such a blessing to our family.

Kadyn

Kadyn continues to be my girly girl.  Painting toenails, fingernails, dressing in princess dresses, putting her hair in piggies, you name it, she LOVES it!  If it were up to her, she'd probably wear a dress everyday.  She continue to be bright as can be.  She gets new concepts and absorbs things into that tiny head of hers so quickly it continues to amaze me.  I imagine what she will become some day and what God has planned for her as it feels it must be something big.  He has given her such a gift.

Kadyn has been biten by the art bug pretty badly.  Her activity of choice in her boredom is to draw, color, doodle, just create, create, create.  She has declared that she wants to be an artist when she grows up.  I'm constantly cleaning up art messes off the table so we can eat.  She gets these ideas in her head of something she wants to make and just goes at it until she finishes her masterpiece.  To me, most of it is so impressive.  I have no other children her age to compare it too, but I'd like to think it's advanced for her age.  She, of course, likes to share her talent and is constantly making things for others.  The daycare parents are often sent home with artwork from more than just their child. 

If I had to describe Kadyn in three words it would be bright, creative, and leader.  Kadyn LOVES, LOVES, LOVES to be the boss of things.  I often have to get onto her about being bossy to her friends.  She just has that take charge attitude.  On a typical day you'll see Kadyn leading the playtime with her ideas and most days she has willing followers.

She loves the company of other adults and so like Brennan, she is a real joy for other adults when they get to watch her.  She is a TALKER.  She will talk to anyone despite my pleads to her to exercise caution when talking to strangers.  Strangers often comment on how much she talks and that she isn't the slightest bit shy.  When we play outside she is often heard yelling "Hi!" when she sees anyone moving all the way down the street.

Kadyn is getting more and more responsible with age and we don't butt heads nearly as much as we used too.  She has certain "chores" that are all her own now and she does a pretty good job at them.  These include brushing her teeth, brushing her hair, making her bed, getting dressed, and taking a bath all by herself.  I am so proud of her for being so independant. It is a real relief and load off of my shoulders.

Kadyn is the BEST big sister a little sister could ask for.  She rarely fights with her little sis and treats her with so much love and affection.  She includes her in play, reads to her, snuggles with her and makes sure to tell her daily that she loves her.   Brennan, of course, ADORES Kadyn for all of this.  They are two peas in a pod.  To see them keep a close relationship throughout life would be a dream come true for me.

I just adore Kadyn and sometimes I have to force myself to close my eyes real tight and remember that tiny baby that I once held in my arms; it's almost surreal how she's just become her own little person.  It's getting to be more and more of a distant memory.  She has really grown into this beautiful, talented, spirited little person and she is a blessing to our family.

Family photo shoot 2010

I've posted a lot of the good ones to facebook, so if you want to see more and haven't seen them already, feel free to check them out.  Here are a few more that I thought were good.  It is going to be hard to only choose a few to put up on the walls.  I must say, it wasn't always easy getting both girls to smile, even with the ice cream bribing that was going on.  So some shots were as good as it gets.  Oh well.  I think we got several good ones.

 

 

 

 

 

Me and my thoughts....

...my thoughts and me.  Want to know what goes through Darci's mind during a run.  Let me give you a taste of what it's like to run with myself.  Granted it's not always like this, but this particular run was one of a kind.

"O.K. here we go.  I really don't feel like doing this right now . I should have went ahead and did this yesterday so I didn't loose my momentum.  Oh well.  I bet I'll get into it once I start going.  I sure wish I could just start out running.  Nope not a good idea for your muscles.  They need to warm up.  Besides, do you really want to run up those first few hills.  They're the WORST.  Yea, you're right.

Crazy, my legs burn even walking up this hill.  Maybe running up the hills is actually easier because you have a little momentum; it's not a slow burn.    I want to stop and take a break.  Are you nuts?  You're only WALKING!  You run up other hills and don't stop.  Yea, you know you can't let yourself do that.  Good thing you have a lot of will power.  Wow, they really have decorated for halloween.  I wonder which house my hair dresser lives in?  I wonder if she would run with me. That would be fun.  Wishful thinking probably.  She's a walker. 

Why does it feel so awkward to walk on the opposite side of the street?    It almost feels.....harder.  Weird.
It's gotta be because it's the opposite side I drive on.  Still...very weird.

I wonder when my butt will start looking perkier with all this running.  Don't kid yourself, it's always going to be saggy.  It's in your genes babe! Seriously, you've been running for a month now and have noticed barely any difference and even gained a pound. So why am I running?  You know it's good for you.  Yep, I know.  You better just be happy with the body you've been given.  It's not bad.  I want to be proud of it.  Can you live with it? .....Yea, I can live with it.

Oh, I'm almost there.  Almost time to start running.  Once you get going you'll feel so better about this, it goes so much quicker once you start running.

I hope I never get the runner's trots.  Man, what would I do?  Would I try to make it back to the house?  Oh Darci, stop it!  Don't worry about that.  Geeze my thoughts are really overtaking this run. I think I need some new music.  It used to be just me, the road, and some good tunes.  At what point did my thoughts take over.  This is really driving me nuts.

OK the hills after this one get much easier.  Do they really, or is it just that I've gotten into my rhythm by then?  Nope, I definitely think they get easier.

Awesome, glad I don't have to do those again.  I love going downhill.  If running always felt downhill, then everyone would run.  But everyone's knees would be shot to he** too.  It's always going to seem weird to me that the first half of running up hill doesn't even feel like you're running uphill and then BAM!  You think you're going to die, but you're so close.  You can't stop now.

What's the shame in walking really?  Man, I really screwed myself when I pushed myself to run this far without stopping.  Now that I know I can do it I have NO excuses. I really would enjoy this more if I walked.  Nope, that would take F O R E V E R to get 4 miles in. Can't do it.  Besides, once you get to the last leg it's so much fun.  Thank GOD I live at the bottom of a hill!

I think I would freeze my butt off in the dead of winter walking.  No walking for me, running is the way to go.


Ugh!  Will this hill get any easier.....EVER?!

Oh there's those yappy dogs again.  Ugh!  I almost didn't hear them over my music this time.  Darn!  At least those dogs are penned up unlike those other little yappers last time.  I like these hills so much better. They almost don't even feel like a hill. That was easy. Am I going faster?  I think watching my shadow just gave me a second wind.  Pace yourself Darci, you're going to push too hard and then give up.  You DON'T want the feeling of giving up do you?


OK just listen to the darn music and this will go by much quicker Darci.  Yes, that's it.

Oh there's that left knee again.  Felt fine most of the run, why now?   It's not bad just....annoying.  Well....I'm not stopping now, I'm almost done anyways.  I love when my feet just keep plugging away and I actually forget they're moving.  Now that is running.   Awesome, my GPS is still working.  It must of just needed the battery jiggled like I thought.  O.K. time to check the GPS.  It says 4.30 miles.  Wait a minute, if I do the math that's....let's see I walked .75...um.....um......  I actually went 3.55 miles running!  I've been doing 3.5 miles running this whole time and I thought it was only 3.25 miles.  AWESOME!  Now too cool down and walk a little more.  Oh, I love the moon in the starry sky over the Ozark Mountains.  I never feel alone.  It's like God is right....there.  O.K. another GPS check....4.55 miles.  Awesome, that's a rap.  There's another run down."

Needless to say, that run was not as good as others. I have decided it's time for new music.  I need to zone out, not listen to my mindless jibber jabber.  I can really drive myself nuts sometimes.  Sometimes I wish I had a partner to run with.